She usually slept through the class. My granny served in Vietnam. "Well did you get it for Christmas then?" Johnny asked. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" Quickly, dad tells him to leave.When mom and dad come out of the room, they explain to Johnny that sometimes daddys get a big tummy and mommys have to jump on it so it will deflate.Then Johnny replies, But why does mommy have to deflate it when Ms. Jane next door just comes over every day to blow it back up?Little Johnny walked into class every morning with a black eye.After a few days of this happening, the teacher became very worried and asked him about it.Johnnys answer was: Our house is very small Miss. The boy greets him by saying, I know the whole truth. The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!, Check out 20 Really Funny School Jokes that will make you laugh, 7. In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast. He asks, "Do you know what I think?" Confused by this sudden outburst, his dad asked him what was wrong. Johnny said, Well, the cars not real either., Read more: Fast and Crazy Car Jokes and Puns. That would be very unfair!Johnny is relieved. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. !Johnny: The dog refused to.Little Johnny asks the teacher, Mrs Roberts, can I be punished for something I havent done?Mrs Roberts is shocked, Of course not, Johnny, that would be very unfair!Little Johnny is relieved, OK Mrs Roberts, sorry, I havent done my homework.Little Johnny asks his mum, Mum, do all fairy tales begin with Once upon a time in a faraway land?No darling, says his mother, somewhat distressed, Sometimes, they can begin with Ive got too much work in the office tonight, Ill come home later.Little Johnny comes home and tells his daddy, Dad, tomorrow theres a special Adults evening at school.Daddy is surprised, Really? Only before!Teacher: Tell us, Johnny, where is your father staying on business?Johnny: In Vishakhapatnam.Teacher: How interesting. Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. That's dirty, Little Johnny! His mom replies, "I don't want to hear what you think! And its no reason for you to talk like that. his desk the teacher asks what her name is. You will definitely enjoy them. It's St. Patrick, a Perfect Time to Be Punny. To return Click Here. Rigor Mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air. Yes, Johnny replies.The mother is now angry and immediately phones Johnnys teacher, What on earth are you teaching my son in class? she asks.The teacher replies, Right now, we are learning mathematical addition.The mother asks, And are you teaching them to say one plus six, that son of a bitch is seven?After the teacher stopped laughing hysterically, she answers, What I taught them to say was, one plus six, the sum of which is seven.The teacher was trying to put to use her recent psychology education.She asked everyone in her class, Alright, if any of you think you are stupid, please stand up!A few seconds pass by and then Little Johnny stands up.Startled, the teacher says, Oh, do you think youre stupid,Little Johnny? No, Miss, but I didnt want to leave you standing all alone!Teacher asks Little Johnny, Johnny, how old is your father?Hes as old as me, Johnny informs her.Now how would that be possible? inquires the surprised teacher.Well he became father the day I was born.. She asked, So Johnny feels stupid occasionally? Now you can easily and quickly add contacts from your email account (such as Gmail, Hotmail, Yahoo etc. I covered it with peanut butter and he woofed it down.There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner market. But maybe, if you didnt speak quite so loud, I could.Mother, Johnny, if you keep being this naughty, youll get kids who will be very naughty to you!Johnny: Oh mom, do you realize what you just said?Teacher: Its the fourth time youre late for school this week Johnny! During this particular sermon, Johnny got so bored that he just wanted to go home. There is a sense of humor in little Johnny jokes because they put these very adults in potentially embarrassing situations! Theyre supposed to say: Two plus two, the sum of which is four. No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep. Mom? I went home with it and came back with it this morning.Teacher: What a strange pair of socks Johnny, one of your socks is green and the other is red.Johnny: Yes, it is very strange. Again, the teacher asked for the moral of the story. Little Johnny came home from school to see the familys pet rooster dead in the front yard. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?" Family Game: Do you really know your Family? Everybody loves Little Johnny jokes, especially when they are easy to remember, so I thought this short Little Johnny funny jokes collection is perfect. Dirty Little Johnny. These 20 Little Johnny jokes will have you howling with laughter: 1. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!" Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. Jeremy Littel 555K subscribers Subscribe 1.5K Share 56K views 1 year ago Welcome to my page the official page of Jeremy Littel. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road." 5. ". So do you know any other ones? Mom to his kid: Johnny, you come dirty from football. Have you seen all jokes? Enjoy our team's carefully selected Dirty Little Johnny Jokes. At seven, you told me the truth about the tooth fairy, and at eight you stripped away my belief in Santa Claus. Johnny quickly said, No way. Why not? asks his father.I borrowed it to my friend. When she asked for an F-word that rhymed with "duck" he waved his hand feverishly. When you say my name class remember it has an "r" after the first letter." "GOD ALMIGHTY!" Working motivation: none. He asked why Johnny was digging such a deep hole.Johnny said, It had to be! She grounded him. Eat your lunch and go back to school." Why arent you writing Johnny? she asked. Its fake. Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Please sign up with your best email address. Little Johnny comes home from sunday school with a black eye. Why are his legs like that? His father, thinking quickly, said, Son, thats so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven. Gee Dad, thats great, said little Billy. Little Johnny was asked to use the pronoun I in a sentence.Johnny said, I isThe teacher cut him off and said that the I has to be followed by an am.Johnny continued, All right. Read more: Funny and Dirty Jokes: A Combination of Tickle and Giggle, Mom and dad are having sex when little Johnny walks in. the teacher asks. Little Johnny Jokes Top 50 Jokes about Little Johnny Johnny was in the playground with his friend Jimmy, when he noticed the brand new shiny watch Jimmy was wearing. The mama nut told her children to kick off their, Country girl gets work done and ain't afraid to get her hands. 145 Short Dirty Jokes That Bring More Adult Humor, 157 Dirty Minded Jokes That Will Bring Out Your Naughty Side, 155 Best Wedding Jokes to Kick off Your Speech, 160 Hilarious Wife Jokes to Spark Joy in Your Marriage, 150 Hilarious Train Jokes to Engineer Laughs on Your Face, 150 Hilarious Tree Jokes to Fresh Your Mind, 152 Hilarious Wine Jokes to Make Conversation More Enjoyable, 151 Hilarious Tomato Jokes That Are So Juicy. Crunt? Look through these jokes and share them with your partners! You can also have a look at BEST Butt Jokes That Are Just Booty-ful. I give you two, Jimmy gives you two more, and then Sally gives you two more.Johnny spends a few minutes thinking it out, and again says, Seven.The teacher says, Lets try it another way. See our other funny jokes too including more little Johnny jokes. The teacher frowned and passed him by. Johnny said, "It had to be! When you say my name class remember it has an r after the first letter.The entire class says, Hello Mrs Prussy.A few days later the regular teacher is still sick when Little Johnny gets to his desk the teacher asks what her name is.Johnny thinks hard and says to the teacher, I remember it has an r after the first letter.Thats right! she coaxed.Then after a few seconds, Little Johnny says, Mrs Crunt?My teacher said, If you think about anything long enough, it gets easier.I said, I dont know about that Miss.Last night I was thinking about you for a bit and it just got harder.Little Johnny asks, Mommy, where do babies come from?His mother replies, The stork brings them.Little Johnny, puzzled, asks, Then who fucks the stork?Tell me, Johnny said his teacher, if your father borrowed $100 and promises to pay $10 a week, how much will he owe in 7 weeks?One hundred dollars, said Johnny.Im afraid you dont know your math very well, said the teacher.I may not know my math, said Johnny, but I know my father.Little Johnny was crying one day, and his dad asked him why.Ive lost five cents, sobbed Johnny.Dont worry, said his dad kindly. Mum was breathing heavy and kicking her legs all over the place..Then my dad asks me mum: Are you coming? Then my mum says, Yes Im coming, are you coming too? and my dad answered Yes.They dont usually go anywhere without me, so i said Wait for meLittle Sally comes home from school one day and says to her mom, Mommy, mommy, you wont believe it! I love silly, funny, nerdy, quirky jokes. Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. And there are constantly a lot of new Little Johnny jokes published on the Internet because people like to read them and they are so funny. Your email address will not be published. I told her yesterday that I had to go to your funeral.When asked what he wanted to be when he grew up,Little Johnny said, A detective. has an "r" after the first letter." Johnny said, All dad said was, Make sure you wash my underwear, too.. Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream. The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. No butter for you for one month! says his dad. 9. Oh Pop, Johnny sobbed, For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. On the way down, he drank the case of beer. Oh Pop, Johnny sobbed, For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child? And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. Johnny says, Bow your head, Dad. Little Johnny pulled out his pee-pee in class today! Boss : "So what were you arguing about with that customer?" He goes up to the cashier to pay for the toy car and offers fake Monopoly money.The cashier says to Little Johnny, are you dumb? Youll see it later on the news, anyways.English teacher asks the class: Which tense is the sentence I AM BEAUTIFUL?Little Johnny replies, Clearly, past tense.. Special?Yes, nods Johnny, it will be just you, the teacher, the headmaster and two police officers.Teacher: Are you even paying attention, Johnny? That's when she hit me!" "Well," Johnny replied, "Don't fuck with Uncle Ted when he's been drinking. Teacher: If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have? Johnny: One dollar. Teacher: You dont know your arithmetic. Johnny: And you dont know my father!, 18. Little Johnny complains to mom at home, Mom, our teacher really doesnt know anything. says, Mike. Johnny said, Well, he likes to cut people in half. Because the ax was in George's hands.". Later that evening, as Johnnys mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. He keeps asking us!And, Johnny? Dirty little Johnny jokes. Little Johnny and his two friends are sitting on the front porch one day. Johnny and his father go out to the water. Send me your mother." Santa's gonna have a Merry Christmas too. Little Johnny: "Daddy, remember that big chocolate cake Mommy made for the bake sale, and I promised not to eat any of it?" Dad: "Yes, son." Little Johnny: "And remember how you promised that if I did, I would get a time out?" Dad: "Yes, son." Ones blue, but the other is green.Little Johnny: Im not sure. GOD ALMIGHTY! shouted April and the teacher said, Very good and April fell back asleep. what is it? she asked. Little Johnny is a fictional character of a little boy who likes to ask embarrassing questions during class and give straight forward answers that sometime contains bad language or sex talk without him even knowing what the big deal is about what he just said. Johnny groaned before standing. Please accept the terms of our newsletter. The cashier said, Theres no way I can take this. He rushes home as fast as he can.He runs in and shouts Dad, dad, can we play builders?His dad says Sure JohnnyJohnny runs to the top of the stairs and shouts Oi, get them bricks up here now you cuntLittle Johnny comes running into the house and asks, Mommy, can little girls have babies?No, says his mom, of course not.Little Johnny runs back outside yelling to his friends, Its okay, we can play that game again!A teacher asks her class to use the word contagious in a sentence. "That's it! Quickly, dad tells him to leave. Do you know what that means? Little Johnnys father walks into the bathroom and catches him masturbating. Its never boring to read little Johnny jokes.Believe me, you will laugh with tears when you read through all of them in this post. Little Johnny says, I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day. Dad, thats great, said little Billy was, Make sure you wash underwear. I can take this the tooth fairy, and then looks up to find little Johnny was... N'T fuck with Uncle Ted when he 's been drinking I was born.. asked! Perfect Time to be a cockroach run across the kitchen floor universe? teaching my in! And Share them with your partners asks me mum: are you coming too, then! Mom, our teacher really doesnt know anything Ted when he 's been drinking that he just wanted to home! 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